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Going beyond Systems of Education: Trans Allyship Starts in the Home

Updated: Nov 16, 2023

Person holding dryers sign that says" HELLO MY PRONOUNS ARE ______/_______"

Leading up to Transgender Day of Remembrance, there are a multitude of ways trans allies within our community can continue to support all our rainbow siblings. It is an afterthought for too many of us unless directly in our everyday sphere. The criticalness of collective awareness, education, and purposeful allyship cannot be overstated. Luckily, resources are available and growing, unlike even a decade ago. I know that no matter how "woke" we are or the gender identities our families hold, the need to stay humble and do better is a personal goal. With that in mind, here are some of the best resources to help kids (and adults) become more vital trans/non-binary/gender-none-conforming allies and better humans overall.

Combating MisInformation with Inclusive Language

As highlighted in multiple well-formed editorial pieces in the past few years, we can all start by assessing our assumptions about gender. Sexuality has its misconceptions and layers, which we are often pigeonholed, but gender is a whole new ballgame. Time magazine's "How to Talk to Your Kids About Gender" is one of the most informative, yet with basic comprehension, articles I have read on the subject. Generalizations become as common as stereotypes without the language to feel empowered to discuss something so nuanced, regardless of the party members' age or background. It starts with our introductions, greetings, and descriptions. Out in public and within our intimate gatherings.

Kids Will Surprise You

Two books highlighting inclusivity on a table. "Red: A Crayon Story" by Micheal Hall AND "Julian at the Wedding" by Jessica Love

Studies have shown that kids start to grasp differences in sex and gender norms by the age of 3-4 years old. If your kiddos are anything like ours, then questions leading to informative discussion can occur almost every week or day. They are so unbelievably inquisitive at that age and love to express thoughts and feelings with more ease finally. Introducing books is primo, starting with any subject. Everything from "Red: A Crayon's Story"(Hall) to "Julián At The Wedding"(Love) to "In My Daddy's Belly: The Story of a Transgender Dad Giving Birth"(Brown), and "They, She, He...Easy as ABC"(Gonzalez) are in our personal library, but there are more greatly resourceful reads out there. If podcasts and YouTube are more your jam, check out all things Lindz Amer @lindzamer and websites like Gender Spectrum. Surprisingly, maybe it shouldn't have been; even Fatherly has an excellent Q&A outline when discussing the topic with young kids.

Don't Sweat It, Be Genuine, Be True

This world continues to be a hostile place for many a queer and not the least trans/non-binary folx. But, despite the phobic acts of aggression and hostility, out and proud politicians and the local community are embracing who they are. Paving the way for others to do the same. It's up to all of us to salute the heroes who are transforming the world closer to an inclusive and empathetic human race, which is the only sustainable way for our species to survive. And find a way for us to be that light no matter the space. To the number of trans families out there - you are not alone. We can do anything together.

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